Confessions of a Martha

The potatoes were boiling over. The table hadn’t been set. The house was absolutely full of guests, and in the middle of it all sat the most important guest she would ever have – the Master. She was doing everything she could possibly do to make his visit into her home absolutely perfect, to serve Him to the best of her ability.

But in the middle of all her guests sat her sister. She was sitting, not cleaning, not cooking, not serving. Sitting. And suddenly she was busting into the group, demanding her sister do what was “right”, and being gently rebuked by the Master all within a few seconds.

To be honest, I understand Martha’s reaction because I am a Martha.

I overcommit, overthink, and overreact far too often. Too often, I try to prove my worth and my goodness by what I do, and suddenly the service that I intended to do for the Master is more about my pride than His glory.

And in those moments, as I hover between pride and longing to rest at His feet like the others, the easiest choice is anger.

But the thing is that there is a time for service, a time to work hard, to do what needs to be done, but there is also a time to sit at Jesus’ feet. His presence is the necessary thing. But if I believe that my good deeds earn His love, I’m going to choose those good deeds over resting in His presence every time.

Because here’s the thing, I can be doing “good” things while neglecting a relationship with Jesus. I can look good on the outside without having sat down and listened to what He has to say. But eventually, if I’m only relying on my own strength, I’m going to get burned out. I’m going to be upset that I am required to serve the Lord in one way when others are not. and end then I’ll up making embarrassing demands of the Lord and others.

I’m a Martha. But I’m learning to find the balance. I’m learning to take the time in His presence so I can serve with a heart that uses it as worship for His glory alone.

I’m a Martha. I’ll never be a Mary. But I can find joy in resting at His feet just like she can.